Every child is unique and different. So, why should I compare my child’s development with another one?
We can’t help it!
I don’t know why, we parents have the tendency to try comparing our children with others.
Even though, I am well aware that my son has his own uniqueness, I cannot say that I have never had the temptation to try comparing him with other children of his age.
Somehow, maybe unconsciously by comparing our children with others, we try to identify if ours grow normally.
But what does it mean exactly ‘growing normally’?
I suppose we see comparison as an indicator or maybe it is like having a rough idea about the evolution of the children of that age.
But it is clear that doesn’t help because we will be more likely to put pressure not only on them but on us as well.
If we notice that our child doesn’t do what the other children do at his age, we might end up pushing our child too much trying to match up the other kids’s abilities.
For instance, my son is 22 months old and soon 23 months. And, as already mentioned in a previous post, he doesn’t say so much yet.
According to scientific researches, a 2 years old is supposed to say 25 words.
My son is currently learning 3 languages. So with all of them together, he cannot even say 20 words.
So, if I have to compare him with others he is apparently behind.
Shall I be worried?
Not at all!
Maybe he’s a slow learner or maybe he’s not!
Remember, he is learning 3 languages so no point for me to compare, or be worried and even put pressure on him.
To be honest with you, I thought he would have taken him longer to say a few words. He is not too bad actually.
Since he’s been going to a childminder, I have noticed he made tremendous progress in his speech language.
Actually, I was not so surprised because there are other children there. Children learn from each other. And, of course my son has been learning English from the children and the childminder herself.
Also, children’s development depend on other factors.
Parents are vital in their child’s development
We parents are the first to shape our children’s brains thanks to the interaction we have with them.
I make sure that I take my time to sit with my son every day with a book. Then, I ask him to find on each page the name of objects, people or animal I quote.
I can see that his memory is very active. He remembers quite well where things are. And more importantly, he identifies some of the images and he can tell me what they are. For instance, he like pointing at a cat and tells me ” chat” (cat in French).
Quite intriguing how his brain works. Some words such as car or door are easier to pronounced than ‘voiture’ or ‘porte’ in French. He does understand what I am talking about but he would chose to say it in English. It’s like his brain goes for a selective option which is for the moment the easiest sound.
Moreover, I believe that by giving to my son all the care and love he needs, he will be thriving and developing better. I believe in the energy of love that brings the best of somebody. I can feel that my son is happy.
A child can learn from several sources.
Screen does help
I would not have thought that one day I would have said that screen help for a child’s development.
I definitely prefer the old-fashion way of just interacting with others.
Unfortunately, we live in different time and environment.
So, I have to adapt. I live in a big cities with no family around.
I could have had not TV set at home. Personally, I don’t watch Tv but my husband does. So, we do have a big screen at home. And my son enjoys watching Youtube video there.
Although, Screen doesn’t provide any interaction, I have noticed that my does learn words from the animated nursery rhythms.
To my surprise, one day I found him repeating words.
As long as, I am seated with him, explaining him things, it should be fine. Also, I have to make sure that the time is limited.
In conclusion, I accept that my son is unique and it might develop differently and at different pace. Therefore, no need for me to compare with other children.
And you? What are your thought on the subject?